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The Brothel Questions....but were afraid to ask (08.03.01)

Nothing like a massage parlor/escort service opening to get people talking. Not since the wood chip debacle have I been so entertained by passionate conversations. For or against, everyone has an opinion.

First of I must admit that I have always had a soft spot for brothels. It all began when my mom and dad got a baby-sitter for my brother and me. Why? So they could attend the screening of what was Dolly Parton's greatest performance in "The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas". I suppose it's because I grew up in an open household where sex wasn't a taboo subject. Not that we talked about it all the time. But I was never programmed to "Just say no" without knowing just what I was saying no to. I mean come on; it's the oldest profession for Pete's sake. We should consider ourselves lucky. Back in the ol' days, a sure sign of a prospering town was, you guessed it, the opening of a massage parlor.

Why, you ask, am I telling you all this? Well it appears that brothel has become the word of the month with Squamish's newest business venture opening up on 3rd avenue. No it's not a brothel, and Yes, The Garden of Eden massage parlor and escort service is now open for business.

Leading up to the grand opening I was very excited. All week I reveled in peoples expressions when I told them I was going to the grand opening. "You're what?" "Why?" I'll tell you why, because I'm very curious. Everyone seems to have an opinion, and very few knew what they're opposed to. I for one, am always excited when a new business comes to town, it's a sign of growth.

But Ever since the business was announced, muni hall has had calls saying they have to shut this place down. Even friends of mine were steadfastly opposed to having such a facility in their neighborhood. Yet most of these people, including myself, had never been to a massage parlor/escort service, and before I formed an opinion I wanted to see just what was going on.

Luckily, the fateful afternoon was taken up with a friend's birthday (Happy 2nd Oliver) and well-attended barbecue party where we counted down the unveiling. So 8:00 rolled around and at 8:05 me and a few other eager beavers made our way to the garden. There we had a quick glance before being told that they'd be ready in about an hour.

Whew, that buys us some time. Time I used to ask people; if they're not going to the opening, what questions would they like answered. That worked out well. After a few shots of courage, we made our way back and this time everyone was ready. Rooms to the right, Rooms to the left, and appetizers all around.

After snacking on some delicious Sunrise Sushi, I went for the tour with one of the hostesses, Candy. Candy, showed me around the several theme rooms. There's the standard room, which is fairly plain when compared to the VIP room complete with hot tub, the Roman room with wonderfully big bathtub, and the
Oriental themed room.

Who was there to take in the events? Well I had convinced many they should check it out and a highlight was definitely seeing Manus and his mom take the grand tour. After my tour with Candy I had a chance to talk with the "Mom" in the Garden of Eden, Paige. To no big surprise, Paige has a good sense of humor and didn't mix words. So, I introduced myself and dove straight into the Questions I had prepared.

Is there any Squamish talent employed?

Not yet. This in fact is only one such facility, two others are located in Kelowna, and Cranbrook. The Ladies only spend two weeks here then rotate through the other locations.

How Much?

Well this all depends on what room you want and for how long. Over a hundred, less than a grand. Interestingly enough there is just a flat fee charged, so you're paying for the ladies time, enjoy it as you will.

Ladies only?

Here I was a little disappointed. There are in fact no male employees. Not to say a lady isn't welcome to use the facilities. They are, but only if they're interested in female companionship. Paige did mention that there have been several requests for male talent so she is looking into it.

Who do you see using the facilities?

Mainly Whistler and Vancouver.

Thoughts on those opposed?

Facing opposition is nothing new for Paige as you can imagine. She was quite confident though saying, by successfully running a professional business she won over both Kelowna and Cranbrook, she'll do her best to fit in Squamish as well.

So there you have it. Will it work? Beats me. All I know is that there are lots of lonely people out there who have lots of money. Will It Work in Squamish? I'm as interested to find out as you are. Really, the only thing that makes this odd is its location. Who knows what manner of crazy events and miss information led to it being located on 3rd avenue right smack dab downtown and beside residential houses. That seems to be people's biggest problem with it. Well, they're not breaking any laws, or by-laws and they fit with zoning regulations so really there's nothing we can do but sit back and once again enjoy the ride. Like I said before, this town is a changing. Hang on!


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