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Eat the Past, Taste the Future (08.04.06)


With the downright staggering shift in the demographic of our sorted little town I believe it’s safe to assume many of you have yet to experience the truly legendary event that is Squamish Day’s Logger Sports weekend. For those who don’t have the time, or are to intimidated to take in all the events, there is really one absolutely must do and that’s the RBQ. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the Rotary Beef Barbecue is truly one of the few sandwich feasts worthy of a 364 day countdown. Could be the amazing feats of saw skill, could be the mustard, most likely it’s the smoked alders binding them all into a feast so good it’s probably a sin.

Back in the day, countless huge timber trucks would line the highway for weeks in advance letting everyone know this was thee weekend to be here. The logs have slowly dwindled over the years leaving us with Squamish’s newest celebrity, Sam (Squamish Axe Man). Sam of course being our latest embrace of advertising methods everyone else has long given up on.

When that handsome fellow first raised his head many cringed thinking now we’re one of those highway towns that have to resort to giant man made spectacles to get people to stop in town.

Personally, I’ve always had a soft spot for tacky tourist lures whether it be a giant ball of string, a humongous coin, rocking chair, what have you. I even like Sam’s name (runner’s up being: Chopper, Howie Sound, Randy Wood, and of course GUS - Giant Ugly Statue).

As far as take-your-picture-and-go attractions, Sam gets points for quality but demerits for originality as Prince George’s PG Pete has been around forever. It’s unfortunate Squamish always seems to be looking at innovations from twenty years ago. They should at least bring it to the last decade by putting a red button at the base you can push to make it sing and dance like the Billy Bass. There are plenty of amazing folk lumberjack songs to choose from (thank you Sunday CBC for making me aware of that), as well I believe there would truly be an uproar if he didn’t perform Monty Python’s classic Lumberjack song. As well you could have him say popular Squamish working man expressions from the past, present and future. Things like “Log it, Burn it, Pave it”, “My job has gone where?”, and “Thank you for shopping at Wall-Mart.”

But Sam is a seasonal visitor and if nothing else, much like celebrity pregnancies and American idol, he can take our mind off bigger problems. Things like the second entrance to downtown, the unsustainable condo explosion, the worlds homeless, corrupt oil money, immoral pharmaceutical companies, Prime Minister Steven Harper saying Israelis killing hundreds of innocents including Canadians in Lebanon is a “measured response” to a kidnapping…. Ugh. So welcome to Squamish Sam, you’re a nice temporary distraction and reminder that the logger sports, bed races and delicious barbecue are just around the corner.


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